Sunday 8 June 2014

Quitting for now

After some serious self reflection I have decided to step back from the whole30 for now at least. My binge eating and bulimia blog will fill you in

Thursday 29 May 2014

Days 3 - 7 Yet another challenge

From time to time I am required to go out into "the field" for work. This means heading off into the wilderness for days at a time with all your meals coming out of pre packaged sachets and tins. The meals are designed to last with no refrigeration and provide quick energy so are very high in sugar, simple carbs and preservatives not to mention the other artificial  colours and flavours to try and make them resemble food.

I've just been told that I'm heading out tonight for four to five days. I'm desperate to stick with the whole 30 so have had to package my own meals. I've packed a bunch of tuna, nuts and jerky and should be able to obtain some fresh vegetables  and fruits out there. I know that the jerky and nuts aren't ideal but they are a better option then the provided stuff. I can't believe how hard it was to find tuna and jerky with. I added sugar and soy. It's amazing how many additives can make it into what I would consider clean food. I've also packed some easy to eat on the go carrots and kale leaves, will see how long they last in the heat.

Will let you know how I go!

So far today my energy hasn't been too bad, not amazing but not the slump of yesterday.

One weird thing though (TMI warning) my urine smells very strange and has a very sweet smell to it. There us no way I can be in ketosis after 2 days plus I've had small amounts of fruit and a sweet potato with dinner. I'm hoping it's my body ridding itself of all the damage I did to it over the last few days but will monitor it as there is always the chance there's something more serious going on with me.  I'm drinking heaps of water but am often very thirsty.

Wednesday 28 May 2014

Day 2.. Hangover

After my epic day 1 fail I restarted yesterday. I'm currently overseas for a few months and living in a hotel so finding compliant foods to it can be tricky to say the least (and expensive!) but I've done my research and am confidant I can manage it- I won't bore you with what I'm eating unless I fall off the wagon.

Anyway yesterday was easy. I made healthy choices and felt very, very smug and pleased with myself especially when a coworker who just returned from visiting my home country dropped by to give me some of our national, delicious, chocolate and sugar filled treats. I sat with them in front of me for awhile totally tempted to just eat them and re-restart my whole 30 but for once in my life self control took over. I've put them in a desk drawer to ponder every now and then.

I skipped a work out yesterday as after 3 nights of sharing a hotel room with mum (who snores, really, really SNORES) I'd had almost no sleep and was totally wrecked. I slept like a log and was pretty sure that I would feel awesome this morning.

Which I did, I ate my breakfast in a cloud of smug thinking that this was easy. By ten am I felt as though I had downed a bottle of wine last night. My head is clouded and aching and I am tired which makes sense as I am very hungover. Now before you judge I didn't drink but I have been on a massive  bread, rice, sugar, alcohol, soy binge for the past week. I can blame mum (and I DO!) but in reality my typical bad food relationship shone through.

I am prone to bouts of fevered binging followed by days of strict calorie restricting (usually in the form of meal replacement shakes) and just saw my final few days as one long last hurrah. From reading the whole30 website this just makes the hangover harder and more drawn out.

Day 1 fail..posting as punishment

Well the title says it all..day 1 and I failed. My mother has travelled overseas to visit me, and yesterday was our last day together, we'd been to the beach and there was a bar with some live music playing and she wanted to have a drink together, I wanted to make her last night fun so we did, three drinks later I had Japanese takeaway and chocolate. My usual mindset of oh well, I've stuffed up so I may as well go overboard and now I feel awful.

Last night as I tried to sleep my heart was racing, I felt hot and anxious which is pretty common after one of my binges so now I am truly ready to get hold of my life and health. I'm adding ten days on as punishment so this will be a whole40 now.

Monday 26 May 2014

Night before...binging goodbye to my bad habits

After the sanity I gained from blogging my rhinoplasty recovery I thought it might help to blog my attempt at the whole30 too. Plus it will keep me honest, no one wants to fail publicly! I've done the whole30 before and felt amazing, then Christmas came along followed by another overseas stint and I pretty quickly ate all my gains away and have been in a terrible starve, binge, purge cycle since.

I know that I have a very negative relationship with food and following strict diet helps as I'm a rules person. I have had an eating disorder (bulimia) in the past  and still struggle with it in my 30s.  I won't bore you too much with my background as if you're reading this you're more interested in my mindset, experience and results huh?

So tomorrow when I wake up (I'm eating a box of white peach mochi as we speak) I will be off alcohol, sugar, grains, legumes, processed food and sweeteners for 30 days. At the moment I weigh 71 kgs and am 173 cm tall, I'm 29% body fat which is pretty bad. I won't be able to weigh myself again until after the challenge.

I've noticed something interesting lately, I've been eating ALLOT more sugar then usual and have started getting heart palpitations and a feeling of anxiety after I eat it. I purchased a blood glucose monitor to check my sugar levels but can't bring myself to prick my finger, in addition to my recent (significant) weight gain I'm desperate to get hold of my health again.

Over the last month I went onto meal replacement shakes (GNC Total Lean Shake) in addition to calorie counting and very high exercise levels I should have lost a fair amount of fat. I lost one kilo, that's it. I was hungry, cranky, tired and unhappy clearly it wasn't working for me.but really why would it? Drinking the equivalent of a few cups of chocolate, chemical laden milk isn't the kindest thing to do to your body.